“Into that good night…”

On this, the five year anniversary of my mother’s death, a re-blog. I miss you, mom. #grief #mentalhealth #cancer #motherdaughterrelationships

“Mother-daughter relationships are complex. The relief you feel to see your mother’s suffering end – when you watch the stress lines around a loved one’s eyes and mouth melt into that peaceful eternal sleep – can be palpable. But the grief for loss of what was and could have been can hang over you like a dark cloud. It can bury you, if you are not careful.”

Camistry

January 27, 2012

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One year ago today, my mom passed away…

Mother-daughter relationships can be complex.  My relationship with my mother was that and then some.  As her only child, I was the focus of her attention, her criticisms, her praise…everything. She was a colorful character, my mom.  She had a deep laugh, a wry wit and a ferocious temper. She was beautifully stubborn, intensely loyal with a deep faith. Mom was a remarkable woman who had shouldered her share of heartache and pain. She was an alcoholic diagnosed as bi-polar quite late in life.  And, tragically, once mom had successfully battled those demons she was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer.

My stepfather has been a rock, of course.  He was incredibly attentive to mom and her needs. He struggled to keep and care for mom at home – probably for way too long.  Although Mom designated me as her…

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2 thoughts on ““Into that good night…”

  1. Very beautifully written Cami. My mom passed away on Nov. 15, 2010 … so we were likely dealing with the same emotions around the same time when our mom’s were passing. It’s a difficult time to let go of someone you’ve come to take for granted in your life … someone who has always been there for you. I sure wish I could pick up the phone and call my mom every once in a while. And, I’m sure that feeling never goes away – you just learn to deal with it.
    Take care my friend.

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